“Toyshop and Pastrycooks” by J. Grimaldi

Sourced from http://www.clownbluey.co.uk/?page_id=164

HARLEQUIN and COLUMBINE run on as if pursued, knocks at PASTRYCOOKS.

He comes forward and they request admittance. He entreats them to walk in.

As they go in CLOWN runs on and sees them enter. Calls PANTALOON and tells him where they are.

They go to shop and find they cannot get in.

Seeing the window above, they go off at stage entrance P3 and return with a letter (ladder), place it under the window and absent (ascends).

When HARLEQUIN looking out of the door waves his slapstick, the window changes to the Sign, and the Sign to the window.

Finding his mistake, PANTALOON comes down and puts the ladder at the other window, mounts up.

When HARLEQUIN again waves and the window changes to a magnificent fire place, enter the WHITE CLOWN and a BOTTLE BOY with a basket of blacking bottles on which is written “Warren’s Blacking”.

Enter together, they stop and look and look into the window.

The WHITE CLOWN steals the sausages and two bottles of blacking and crams them into his pocket – and exit BOY.

WHITE CLOWN seeing no butcher goes into the shop, brings forth a pail, empties blacking bottle into it and throws sausages into it to dye then black – which CLOWN hangs them up at the butcher shop for sale.

Goes into shop and brings out Red Nightcap, steel and apron which he puts on and says,
“I’ve taken possession”
and BOYS come on crying “Meelons”

CLOWN, he says he play them at marbles.

CLOWN goes into TOY SHOP and buys marbles when one of the BOYS steal it. “A sullen reception” – and a report taking place at the same time – CLOWN takes off the letter (ladder), the fireplace disappears leaving it as a window.

While CLOWN is assisted on his left again by PANTALOON, HARLEQUIN helps out with COLUMBINE and goes into the TOYSHOP – CLOWN recovers his fall and seeing PASTRYCOOK’S door open goes with PANTALOON.

HARLEQUIN slaps the door and an inscription appears “ICE HOUSE”. They return quite cold.


The sign of the CONFECTIONERS changes back to window – several characters may appear and go into the shop as if to buy meat and off again.

CLOWN and PANTALOON astonished at the change of scene – when a POULTERER’S BOY enters – with a basket of fowl and (CLOWN) steals a string of sausages and a piece of beef and runs off. –

HARLEQUIN changes the BUTCHER’S SHOP shut up

CLOWN returns and plays BOY at marbles.

At that time HARLEQUIN changes the TOY SHOP to a “PRISON” which the CLOWN at present does not see.

A PARISH BEADLE now enters having a WOMAN in custody. /This character to be acted by a man/ He has a trick child in her arms, the face is painted like the CLOWNS. She is Inebriated and dressed exactly like Moll Flaggon.

The moment she sees the CLOWN she screams out “That he. That he” and throws the child into his arms.

The PANTALOON coming out at this time enquires the meaning of the quarrel when the BEADLE informs him – while this is going on CLOWN takes from his jacket the other bottle of blacking and blacks the child’s face and says “There you see it’s none of mine” and thrusts the child into her arms. (CLOWN) Look again and runs off.

MOLL follows him – fast gallop – BEADLE after her followed by PANTALOON.

They follow each other off at one wing, on to the next, cross the stage, on again at the first entrance with CLOWN leading – the others being too close behind him fall over each other, when PANTALOON getting up secures the WOMAN assisted by CLOWN

BEADLE unlocks the PRISON door – leaving the key in it and WOMAN put into it

BEADLE now seizes the CLOWN and tries to take him in also, gets him to the door – his back towards it when CLOWN gives him a push and he falls backwards into the PRISON and the key being in the door locks him in

BEADLE entreats to be let out but no go is the word and the scene closes with WOMAN and BEADLE who are seen sighing through the bars of PRISON.

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One Response to “Toyshop and Pastrycooks” by J. Grimaldi

  1. It all makes sense when you realise that CLOWN, HARLEQUIN and PANTALOON are Transformers and this is part of the leaked script for Michael Bay’s Transformers 4.

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